I picked up my make-up work from Chronos-sensei yesterday, I didn't realize there would be so much from missing a week's worth of classes, but when I brought it back to my dorm....I realized how behind I actually am on my schoolwork, there's a ton in the corner of my room that I've never even touched, I've just never really had the time to do it with everything that's been going on.
I know I'm not the perfect student, but...I WANT to graduate this year! I want to carry on with my journey, I...
...I want people to be proud of me! Not because I'm the hero who saves the day, I want them to be proud of me for me being myself! I want to graduate, I want my friends and all the people important to me to see that accomplishment!! But I'm so far behind, will I even catch up with it at this rate?
There's so much I feel I've been missing recently. After Darkness... I just... I just wanted a break, a chance to have some fun, hang out with my friends, spend time with Asuka, have more happy memories before I graduated, but bad things just kept on happening, even dueling doesn't bring the same joy to me that it used to, a lot of my duels recently have resulted in something bad happening...or to solve something...to save people...to save the world.
Not that I regret that, I've helped so many people, and I'm glad I have the power to do that! I've grown so much in that area and I want to use this power to help those who need it!! But...it...honestly feels like there's a part of me...somewhere...that's missing. I've felt like that for a long while now, something deep down just feels like it's gone and I'm not sure what it is.
I've been through so much lately and had loads of stuff just constantly keep piling up on me. Bad guy, after bad guy, after bad guy, some of which were working at the same time, I lost count with how many times I've been in the infirmary just this year alone...
Just...urgh, I just feel so tired and frustrated with it all right now and the fact that I may not even graduate this year doesn't make this feeling any better...
What the hell am I going to do!? I'm trying to do some of this work now but I just can't concentrate on it at all right now for some reason!!
((OOC: The above post is actually NOT private, it's open to all characters to comment on. Juudai was trying to make it private so not to worry his friends, but he failed somewhere along the way. The bolded parts I'm playing off as a type of broken code, thus your characters will be able to see this was intended to be hidden from them.))